| maybe i still dont remember how things used to be... |
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| the horrible truth |
[16 Nov 2004|09:35am] |
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sry about that last entry that was some stupid bitch on my lj... lol eww man can u get a worst pic of me? w/e i dont update this much anymore cuz 1 im 1 busy. 2 i dont feel my PESONAL life should be shared 2 just anyone. cuz as everyone knows. all ppl from verela do is talk shit. so thats it. peace out
<3 ya D. ill call everyday from brazil.
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[31 Oct 2004|09:16pm] |
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Norma Jean- memphis will be laid to waste |
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yesterday was the best day i had in a VERY VERY VERY VERY long time. turns out that the audiences response 2 our music went very well. ppl even moshed. thats awsome considering we were opening band. also. i got alot of credit for playing drums with a broken foot. sucks that they didnt mic up my set thought. whatever its all goo di guess. as for 2day. umm cant trick or treat with a broken ankle can i? nope. so alex and tammy volunteered 2 do it for me =) also. 4 those who dont know. as i stated above i broke my ankle on friday doing flips w/ rudy. also dianas not happy which makes me not happy.. CHEER UP DIANA! ohh yea 2 ALL THOSE WHO DID NOT GO 2 KAFE hrump hrump "marshall" or anyone else that didnt go cuz or roberts "house party" i told all of you. just cuz girls guys have 2 pay $3 2 get in and girls get in free.... doesnt mean that anyones gonna go.... lol. and as i told u all. i heard that roberts party was nicknamed "cockfest2004" haha. good job. thats what u get when u put girls in front of ur friends. =). 2 all those who didnt get 2 c us play since we opened....
theres a show
on nov 13...
line up is.
ZERO LOGIC, BRANDED, A THING FOR LOSING, DEFY ALL LOGIC, RADIO
be there. we will be selling tickets starting 2morrow.
so i guess thats it. thx plenty 2 alex and tammy. sry im always so mean 2 u alex i swear ill stop cuz i owe u one. =) and tammy much love. also shout out 2 diana <3 my @ng3L F@c3... i guess thats it. thiagos here w/ me we are watching movies and playing a game so im dippin peace.
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| and i didnt want to know |
[24 Oct 2004|09:26pm] |
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music |
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perfect circle- blue (remix) |
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band practice went well. we ordered papa johns for once. NEVER AGAIN. what bullshit... "they dont have medium sized pizzas. they only have small large and extra large..... wait shouldnt the large be medium and extra large be large? w/e ther are 2 dope for that or something. well we went in the pool for once. and even mike came in X.X henry didnt thougth. he left rigth after practice. right now im mellow. not sad. not excited. i feel rather alright. its cool how a song can bring me so much ecstasy. im listening to "perfect circle- blue(remix" its much better than the original. its strange. i went 2 their concert and everything. then NOW i realize how good they are.... lol guess im just stupid that way. also ive been listening 2 beatles lately.. ? lol eleanor rigby "awsome song" its also very mellow. and the transplants "diamonds and guns" haha wierd that song is teh song from the garnier frutic commercial. good thing they didnt put the lyrics on ths commercial. haha. well i guess this is it 4 now. also sunset was alright yesterday. i went w/ gordon and elisia and esther were there 2 we hung w/ them 4 a little while. but im bored of writing how i feel. its not my thing so peace
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| and let the good times roll |
[23 Oct 2004|09:43am] |
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perfect circle- blue (remix) |
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sry about the last entry. i was very emotional. forget anything i said there. i suddenly dont care. so yesterday we had band practice. we kicked out rene. and amazingly practice went rather well for once. after that we went to sunset. it was wierd i have not been 2 sunset since like 8th grade when me and stephanie were going out. its so wierd when i went everything reminded me of her. i would look at locations and remember wow i was there with her doing this or that or w/e. odd part is i didnt get sad for one minute. i looked at them as good times and it made me so happy. besides that i think i was the least bit buzzed cuz me and mike had some liquor b4 we left the house. but it was VERY VERY VERY little. so i was practically sober. but yea after that im lkinda looking forward to going 2 sunset 2day. idk maybe its jus tthe tiem of year or something. but it felt so good. i dont know it was great. so yea 2day idk if biancas going 2 go "sry eddy" she has 2 do somethign w/ her mom or something idk. . i just completely forgot abotu everything and it still hasnt come back 2 me in anyway. ANYWAYS. 2day im still probably going 2 sunset. idk w/ who yet thought considering that henry has a date. casey will probabyl hang with pam. and mike idk about. but b4 anything i have 2 go cuz i need 2 drive 2 fort lauderdale 2 pick something up for my dad. x.x well g2g peace. ill only be updateing occasionally. so peace out
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[16 Oct 2004|11:04pm] |
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everlast- what its like |
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2day was a pretyy horrible day. woke up with mike and casey next 2 me (they spent the night). which was comforting. then casey left after we watched "the day after 2morrow". after casey left me and mike went 2 kafe krystal. worst mistake for both of us. ill leave mikes business his own. but as for me. i hate myself. i dont understand why i am who i am. i still dont get why i have to get so attatched to someone who can give a fuck. and i always get my hopes up so high just so that when things happen they smack me in the face twice as hard. why am i like that? you can tell me to go to fucking hell and probably say it with pure hatred in your eyes. and i will still have faith that u dont mean it. im sick of this. why is everything like this for me? by the way. this is my last livejournal entry. im sick and tierd of shareing out who i am to all those people who dont give a fuck anyways. im sick and tierd of holding things in until i get home to type it onto a fucking computer screen and write a few "lol"s or "j/k" and pretend like im happy like i always do. Besides. i remember the one reason why i made my livejournal. it was so that i can always let someone know how i felt. someone who at 1st was nothing then became so much i waited 2 months for the slightest chance to be with her. but now it became really clear that since she doesnt give a fuck. and that since i was just something to help her get over her problems. its really not necissary. i really dont wanna hear any bullshit after this comment from ANYONE. plz. dont mention it cuz i will say stfu and make u feel like shit. im sick and tierd of walking throught the halls and seeing nothing but couples and saying 2 myself.. man i had that. i really did. now look at me. im here sitting down by myself writeing on a fucking journal with tears about to fall off for something i couldive so easily avoided.im really sick of how my lifes going. its like mike said "i might as well just go home and put on a collar cuz im such a pussy" i wish i was one of those guys that dont give a fuck. who just act like they do. rip and dip. who gives a fuck they are just girls.... y cant i be like that? i really really wish i was. the people i know who are like that get around just fine. and they never have to go through stuff like this i guess when all u think abotu is urself and haveing fun you become really inconsiderate of those who were there for you in your time of need. im not pointing fingers. and from the moment this entry gets out. i no longer wish 2 ever hear of livejournal again. it has casued me nothing but problems. things id normally share with that one special person. im shareing freely with the world. also i found out i ditched diana by mistake. in my selfish acts i completely forgot i had made plans with her 2day. im sooo sry diana. call me and ill make up for it in ANY way possible. well.... so here i am. pussy in my room once again writeing about how i feel on a stupid internet site. no more of this. really. no more. peace out ppl and thx to all those who left comments and actually cared when i needed someone by my side. chances are if u kno wmy l/j name u know my s/n so im me or something. but u wont find me here anytime soon
bye
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| and now that ive forgot you. every opportunitly to talk to you seems to show up. |
[12 Oct 2004|05:29pm] |
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lost prophets |
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ok so today was a moody day. b4 school i played guitar then @ 1st since it was raining we had a slack day. basically me, diana, bianca, jenny, and kim chilled most of the period. "omg kim acted normal around me for once. and her leg is very comfortable" anyways. we hung out and talked and stuff for like an hour. apparantly bianca and jenny got mad cuz i never reminded them 2 come 2 my party. SRY! it wasnt my fault u never asked when it was.. hehehe. anyways. lunch was alright. sasha and tammy gave me pigtails. after that i went back 2 class and started thinking. apparantely my friend ricardo does something called GOLIATH ACADEMY. its a high school degree that u get instantly. all u do is pay 600 dollars and take a test. i think i might drop out and get this. its pointless. my gpa is 2 low. im always sad in school. i have no motivation or anything to look forward 2. so this is highly in my mind. hmm after lunch something happened that really pissed me off. i got sad/mad and no im not at all open 2 speak of why i feel this way. 2morrow i highly doubt im going 2 the battle of the bands also. this saturday im hopeing 2 maybe catch a movie and then buy new shoes and maybe some clothes. well thats it i guess buh bye
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| even thougth u think i like her. even thougth ur friends say i like her. i dont i like u...still |
[10 Oct 2004|10:26am] |
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ok so yesterday was my party. it was more like a get 2gether thougth. i guess inviteting everyone the day b4 it was a bad idea.. there was like 12-15 ppl. not anywhere near half the amount of ppl i invited. but its all good cuz we had an alrigth time. haha thx diana 4 showing up even thougth u only stayed 4 like 5 mins. i guess it mustive been really gay 4 u cuz u didnt know any1 and everyone was in teh pool except u but thx anyways for comeing. shows u care. anyways. i was hopeing something would happen that would change teh way things are going. something that would make me happy and stuff but no such luck. ANYWAYS. after the party started calming down inside. we went 2 watch some dvd thing einard brougth. it was ALRIGHT bu also very boreing at the same time. anyways elisia and esther were distant of everyone the whole time so i had 2 keep trying 2 make them be with everyone cuz i felt bad. also esther broke my phone, a plate, and ruined all the hot dogs.... haha. after everyone left. it was me thiago eddy elisia and esther. we went up into my room and stayed bored. after that wedropped off esther and elisia @ publix 2 get picked up and then went 2 mcdonalds and back home. eddy ended out not sleeping over cuz his mom didnt let him. good thing i guess. cuz after mcdonalds i ended out falling asleep right after he left.
today. so 2day im hopeing someone will call me "not saying who" cuz i have 2 have a word w/ them but dont wanna do it unless they call me. but other than that. i have 2 clean my car. fix the backyard. and then i guess chill the rest of the day. until then. i guess im done i think i wrote enough. laterz
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| Now this thang is jumpin aint it somethin? what makes it special? this whole moment came from nothin |
[02 Oct 2004|03:31pm] |
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bubba sparxxx- ugly |
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Damn so lets see. i havent posted in a while. and so much has been hapenning that i dont remember when they happened. so ill jsut post up. me and mike got into a fight. i quit the band. casey calls the next day and fixes things. im back in. casey leaves town 4 the weekend. and yesterday was a HORRIBLE day. after school my dad picks me up and so i go to pick up mike in my car. after we pick him up we go to pick henry and andrew is to come also. all of a sudden i try to change lanes and out of NOWHERE this car is next to me "damn those blind spots on the mirrors" well w/e i saw it and swurved back. Then when we are at andrews house to pick up henry and andrew i slam the trunk by mistake and it slams so loud that the people who were inside the cars ears start ringing...... after that we come 2 my house and andrew trys to pick up this little food thing "its very sensitive and durns into like dust if u sqeeze it. and he popped it and it went all over hte floor so he decided to clean that up. later on rene couldnt come. we all got very lazy. so band practice was a total waste. ANYWAYS later that night im online talking 2 diana. when someone i had been very anxious to talk to for a very long time but never comes online comes online. so we say hi and stuff and like for a couple of seconds im happy. then i open a cup of icecream thing form dairy queen that my grandfather bought me and poof it falls all over my pants. so i run to my moms room to clean it up off my pants. so i decide to change my clothes and by the time i get back. the person has signed off. so yea shitty day. as for 2day. boreing day. my only plans are to go to a baby shower for like half an hour. simply beacuse jr is going to it and he wants me 2 pick him up. but its rude 2 pick him up and leave. so me and thiago will go for like 30 mins then leave and then go somewhere. to where? i have no clue but i am hopeing we get a good idea on where to go. also....
MY BIRTHDAY IS OCTOBER 6!!!! this week. im turning 16 for those who dont know. im hopeing that something will happen on that day that will cheer me up. like just that something happens that changes the way that things are going now..... ohh well i doubt it. BUT my birthday party is this saturday. so dont make plans cuz chances are ur invited "no liquor, or drugs cuz the parentals shall be constantly in and out of my house. so yea chances are we will get "wet" since i have a pool and people tend to turn any actrivity into a pool party. ALSO october 7th. THESE POEPLE MOVE OUT OF MY HOUSE. so finally i get freedom to do as i please in my house once again and FINALLY i can have people come over again and come up 2 my room and stuff. and FINALLY no one touches any of my stuff anymore. but just keep in mind october6= birthday... and a party that saturday. well im out peace
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| you feel so empty but i got me a friend |
[25 Sep 2004|11:10am] |
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silverstein- when broken easily fixed |
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damn once again i havent updated in a while. ok so let me see.. yesterday was a wierd ass moody day. there are quite a few things going bad in my life and they all kinda hit me hard all at once 2morrow. ok so one is we didnt make it into battle of the bands.. BUT it was so strange cuz everyone told us we did so awsome and we made it in 4 sure. like not in a way that they didnt mean it. but yea someone "reliable source i cant say who cuz mike didnt tell me who" told us that the results 4 our band were preset. thing is we all acted like asses and messed around alot. xcept 4 mike. but yea. im guessing its a lesson learned. ALSO i have 3 more really really really bad things going on that i wont write about until i feel the time is right. so yea yesterday the 4 things hit me at once. and im like wtf? but w/e i guess i got better around like 3 in the morning. in like 2 in the morning i was sleeping "in my sisters room cuz im sleeping there now" and i just get vivi and emilia wake me up. and so me emilia, vivi, and my sister stay up all night messings around and shareing stuff and basically hanging out. UNTIL i grab emilias phone and look througth her pictures and find some wierd ass pics.. so she decides 2 explain and goes 2 my sisters computer and goes 2 like this website w/ like "penis rings" and all this other wierd ass shit. it was so funny we stayed up all night ccracking up until vivi got tierd and went home. ok so 2day there the hurricane.... kk cancelled probably. eighter way im not going cuz im not stupid 2 go 2 a show during a hurricane. so yea. i also found something out last night kind of odd. but w/e. as 4 defy all logic. we have a new point of view of things. new website comeing. and yea thats pretty much it. so yea i guess im writeing alot so im out. sry 2 all of those who wanted 2 c us live. hmm well u can c us @ kk nov 13th OR next weekend. we still havent got from texas the adress but check the defy all logic livejournal 2 c when cuz ill post it. defy_all_logic
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| havent updated in a while |
[21 Sep 2004|11:56pm] |
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getting impatient and happy |
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erics voice crying in my head |
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ok i havent updated in a while and theres alot goin on so heres the down low.
saturday
i went 2 the mall and hung out w. stephanie and mellinda. fun as hell. UNTIL stephanie gets some stuff out of me. that form what i hear eric is always flirting w/ some girl in hammocks and that most of hammocks thinks hes going out w/ this girl. dont know who. dont know when. this is what i hear.
sunday
stephanie tells lisi i told her stuff. but OVEREXAGGERATES IT saying i said erics cheating on her. tecnically its not. cuz he hasnt kissed anyone. so stephs fault there. also eric thinks hes hard as a little hammocks kid and starts trying me. my decisiions are made i kick his ass 2morrow morning.
today
woke up late. after that eric calls me when im walking 2 school and then when i ask where he is he hangs up. later in the day einard tells me that i supposibly said "i was there when all this flirting happened" which is SOOO much bull. and eric starts trying me AGAIN and then i decide 2 take stephy, nick, esther, thiago, nelson, and soo many other ppls advice that its not worth fighting a friend. so i decided they are right cuz ive fought friends b4. i know how it feels 2 look at a past friend after u kick there ass. u feel like shit. ERIC has never felt this cuz hes never fought b4. maybe when he grows up some more and goes 2 verela he will understand. and when his ego goes down when he comes into verela.
2morrow
eric started trying me and im getting VERY VERY VERY impatient. he is talking lots of shit and im really starting 2 reconsider this whole "be the better man dont figth him" crap. i swear if i hear one more word or if he has the guts 2 swing at me 2morrow. his ass is good as dead. cuz i dont talk shit and not back it. if he keeps trying im gonna beat his ass. lots of people expect a fight 2morrow >=) we will c. ALSO 2morrow after school i have band practice and henry is back rapping on his vocal shit bitch =) big smile on my face there. so watch out 4 the rappin on batle of the bands if we make it. also 2 all those in svk. watch out cuz erics making u look bad by telling ppl things like "we are 2 big for house partys or kafe krystal, and you guys who do play house partys and at kafe krystal will never make it nowhere" also hes a pussy 4 talking crap and saying we suck when infact the only thing he does in avk is copy what einard does on TEMBLE CLEFF. when bassists are supposed 2 play on BASS CLEFF. he plays on the same tuning. the same root notes and still uses a pick. so dawm. in their website when they said "ericito intrument- plucks strings they are dawm right thats all he does cuz thers no harmnony in what he does. so good luck eric. yea ur really a rock star now playing at a nudist colony =) \m/ ....... yea btw i dont think the other members in defy all logic are 2 fiendly w/ the guys form svk anymore. nothing against the band. but when u talk shit about us we talk shit about u. so fuck u eric. if u have the balls 2 come up 2 me 2morrow theres 2 hits. me hitting u. u hitting the ground. im trying 2 avoid shit and not cause MORE problems cuz i know thats all that will come. but w/e hey if u want a bloody nose keep it up =) well im out ppl peace stay chillin
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[18 Sep 2004|08:19am] |
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mindfed-taste of your tear |
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ok so 2day my mom wakes me up @ 7 in the morning crying =/.... turns out my sister went out last night and never came back..... doesnt answer her phone.... and no one knows where she is. the only thing they know is she went out with norman "her new boyfriend" suddenly i remember shes @ normans house. then suddenly my mom calls my sisters friend "vivi" and then vivis mom comes 2 my house 2 check pick up my mom and find out where she is. they go to normans house and it turns out that my sister slept it O.O..... so suddenly my sisters a fucking hoe and that fuckign dick got in her pants.... my reaction?? im gonna kick that motherfuckers ass and shes breaking up w/ him cuz ima make him. he was an alright guy. except he has no respect 4 girls. its so amazing.... my sisters had 1 boyfriend i actually LIKED and thougth was good enoguth 2 date her. and wasnt just trying 2 use her 2 get in her pants... but that guy moved away and got kidnapped for like 3 years.. now hes back. and my sister talks 2 him again and "supposibly hes gonna come back in a few months".. well it pisses me off 2 know that the assholes always get w/ my sis cuz this "norman" guy is very very fake. he treats me like im 5. and anyone who knows my sis knows shes not a hoe in any way. shes infact very prude. but this guy kinda "forces" kisses and stuff. and then he made this comment cuz he is a "rapper" he says that once he gets famous for his rapping hes going 2 "call me over to his house and i will c him with all his putas sitting on his lap" fucking dick i hope that faggot doesnt think my sisters one of those putas. cuz i swear ill choke his ass b4 he gets another chance 2 get my sister 2 sleep over. i know its probably nothing but this idk. if it was someone else i probably wouldnt care but this guy yea i do...... also i think my sisters in ALOT of trouble from my mom. and how embarrasing that must be 4 her... damn shes fucked. i just hope for some odd ass reason she didnt do everything i think and i kjnow u all think she did. well thats it i guess...... 2day i guess im eighter going 2 the mall or steevos house. or possibly both. who knows. bu i guess thats it. maybe ill update later on at night. peaceout yo
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| bye bye beautiful... dont bother 2 write |
[16 Sep 2004|10:19pm] |
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coheedandcambria- a favor house atlantic |
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damn 2day was good. i had band practice and we actually got alot done. other than caseys vocals we already know the whole song we are gonna try out 2 battle of the bands w/ the song is by lost prophets. "the fake sound of progress" we are haveing problems with the vocals thought... =/ sucks cuz we just about everything else is almost perfect. well casey had 2 leave 2day 2 look 4 a job. and im going 2 be doing the same also considering i turn 16 next month and am supposibly supposed 2 be getting my car on my birthday. ohh man. ALL OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO I TOLD ABOUT 2 HOLD UP THE DEFY ALL LOGIC FLYERS DURING THE BATTLE OF THE BANDS "if we make it".. u better do it. and to all those others im asking u. IF DEFY ALL LOGIC PLAYS AT THE BATTLE OF THE BANDS. COME SUPPORTING THE BAND. PIN A PAPER WITH THE BANDS NAME ON UR SHIRT OR HAT OR WRITE IT ON A BOARD OR PAPER AND HOLD IT UP WHILE WE PLAY!!! we wanna c if this works bcuz we have some pretty unfair competition. that is if we make it. lots of bands trying out this year.
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| bye bye beautiful... dont bother 2 write |
[16 Sep 2004|10:19pm] |
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damn 2day was good. i had band practice and we actually got alot done. other than caseys vocals we already know teh whole song we are gonna try out 2 battle of the bands w/. the songs
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[13 Sep 2004|09:36pm] |
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[13 Sep 2004|09:02pm] |
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mindfed-encounter |
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ok so this weekend was alright. sat kinda sucked but yesterday i was really really happy. and as for 2day. not my day... i went 2 school and had fun in 1st 3rd and 5th. but i found something out in lunch but shh... and yea that kinda made my day... then i came home and fell asleep watching A2Z guns and roses w. thiago and woke up like 10 mins ago =X so sry if u imed me at all and i didnt answer... its cuz i was asleep.....
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[12 Sep 2004|12:05am] |
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my thoughts.... |
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2 day i casey came over at like 12 or 1. then we hung out and worked on the website alittle until we decided 2 pick up pam. then we went 2 dolphin. i was supposed 2 hang out w/ suzie brittney casey and pam. unfortunantly suzie never came and someone i dont like came. so i hung out w/ casey, pam, kathy, gio, esther, elisia, and some other ppl. we wanted 2 watch a movie but the stupid ppl didnt let us cuz resident evil is rated r..... so we walked around. and me and elisia ended up alone so we talked and stuff. ohh man. look at pams journal 2 c some funny ass picks of me and her and casey and THX 4 NOT COMEING SUZIE!!!. lol w/e im sure u have ur reasons. well i came home and now im here. bored and thinking.
well thats it ppl
ohh and theres 1 person
i really care about.
but nothings happening or
ever gonna happen so w/e
shit happens. ohh well
peace outz
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| i will never make another promise |
[10 Sep 2004|09:10pm] |
I'm sorry it took me so long
I'm sorry it took me so long to come around
I'm sorry it took me so long to come around
Your famous last words started once your fingers hit the snooze
Just nine more minutes, please..
And they They all know where to find me
Every word that I said, what a big mistake
And the ones you left out are keeping me away
Well I will never make another promise without you
I will never make another promise with you in mind
So pace the stairs to your apartment
Like it's where you wanna be
where you wanna be
It's where you wanna be
where you wanna be
I'm sorry it took me so long
I'm sorry it took me so long (to come around)
I'm sorry it took me so long (to come around)
Well theres a secret I've been perfecting,
I swore I wouldn't but you let me
I'm comfortably confused
(and you...) You've gotten so removed
You know I, I could take the place of those pills
Ocean blue, paint it white
Now who ya gonna call tonight?
Well I will never make another promise without you
I will never make another promise with you in mind
So pace the stairs to your apartment
Like it's where you wanna be.
where you wanna be
It's where you wanna be
where you wanna be
We paint our sins on the ceiling
I keep them glued to my chest
It keeps me close like a promise kept
Say yes, say yes, say yes, say yes
If I talk in my sleep, will you just keep trying? We paint our sins on the ceiling
I might give it up, if you just keep trying Well I keep them glued to my chest,
If I talk in my sleep, if I talk in my sleep, it's gone It keeps me close like a promise kept.
Say yes, say yes, say yes, say yes
I'm sorry it took me so long
Say yes, say yes, say yes, say yes
I'm sorry it took me so long
So pace the stairs to your apartment
Will you stop me, I just wanna know
I'm sorry it took me so long
Like its where you wanna be
Will you stop me, I just wanna know
where you wanna be
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[09 Sep 2004|03:45pm] |
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not so bad |
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coheed and cambria- a favor house atlantic |
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ok so 2day ive been pretty pissed off. also pretty sad. i cant keep holding on like this. i am sick and tierd of waiting and waiting and nothing good comeing. so i think ive decided 2days the last straw. i found out that someone is now friends w/ someone that i dislike. idk it irritated me cuz the last time i trusted this person i dont want this other person 2 talk 2 w/ something. they ended out takeing alot from me. well im kinda pissed abotu it and i was really sad the whole day. but ive decided that this is all just a waste of time. and that im not gonna sit here and wait 4 this. well i guess i feel much better now. im going 2 be updateing the defy all logic website so watch out 4 that and keep an eye on it =) www.defyalllogic.tk so yea i guess thats it......
also........ I LOVE HOW NO ONE LEAVES COMMENTS!!!!!!!!!!!
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| getting happier on my own. |
[05 Sep 2004|10:04pm] |
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mood |
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good |
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music |
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incubus- the warmth |
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wow. so i noticed these past few days ive been cheering up alot more. thx partly 2 jr i guess cuz he was here and hes always fun 2 chill w/. man. ive realized how much i changed from 8th grade 2 now.... wierd. and i havent changed 4 the best eighter. ppl always call me an asshole after i make a joke on someone or something. and sure they dont really mean it but it always kills me a little bit inside in the end. ive decided im going 2 chill out w/ the name calling and haveing 2 be "mr.disser" all the time. ive realized lately that all i can do is call ppl names and its starting 2 get 2 me even thoguth no one notices or takes it serious cuz i never mean it seriously. well i havent updated in a while.so here goes
so we had a 5 day weekend. jr came over, felipe came over, helen came over. i almost got electrecuted and saw a sight i will NEVER forget. wierd how scary it was. yet how beautiful it was at the same time... me and felipe decided it was really nice outside cuz i love cold and windy at the same time and so does he. it was like 12 at night. so we walk like a few blocks from my house. then suddenly all the power down everystreet goes off. and the next thing we see is a GIANT WHITE AND BLUE BALL WITH GREY LIGHTNING BOLTS COME OUT OF THE END. we ran those 4 blocks in like 5 seconds back 2 my house cuz we got so scared. it was so close 2 us... it covered the whole sky. so yea. man. the best song in the world. incubus- the warmth. im not much of a fan. but Man. it just gets into ur skin and give s u this feeling...
well i dont feel like writeing much. peace
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| wow i never thougth id feel like this for you |
[01 Sep 2004|06:23pm] |
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mood |
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crushed |
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music |
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blindside- pitiful |
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wow. im so confused. these past 2 weeks have been so gay 4 me. and i wish u knew how i felt. no actually. i wish u felt back. w/e i know u wont read this. and if u do i know u wont care. you know who you are. just know that i never really expected 2 feel this way again for anyone other than you. im writeing this cuz i know for a fact you will never get to read this. you probably dont care enougth 2 read this. im trying to get ovet the harsh reality that is...im not gona keep feeling the way i do for you when you are not here with me. when you dont feel for me. just know that i really like you alot and i never htougth id like someone as much as i like you after stephanie. and its a shame we never talk anymore, i really do miss you. when i heard i still had a chance i got so happy. a smile jus tcame over my face and i tried 2 hide it to not look stupid. i got so happy and so anxious. when you got near my heart beated so fast. and then i find out you suddenly dont feel the same. it just stepped on teh little bits and pieces of pride and hope i had left. so there u have it. i will give this 1 more attempt. and if it fails then tahts it.... thats it...
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